Sunday, July 24, 2011

La Dolce Vita


As a general rule, Rohan let the alarm ring for about ten seconds before he hit the off button. Partly because that’s the time it takes for him to slowly rise to consciousness, and partly because that’s how long it takes Wagner to get into the roaring chords to the Ride of the Valkyries. Rohan hit the off button on his alarm, kicked the tangled sheets off his bare legs and groped for his phone. Friday 9pm. That meant house party at Sanjay’s place.

To say that Rohan enjoyed his singlehood is an understatement. He relished it the way fat people relished chocolate fudge cookies. His apartment was a tiny, sunlit two-bedroom on the top floor of an old building in the leafier parts of besant nagar. He once had a female roommate, and the cane furniture and floor cushions, yellow paper lanterns from auroville and framed black and white prints of old Madras were her touch. When she got a boyfriend, she moved out, taking with her, her shoes and things and leaving behind – one of the many things she left behind – a row of green bottles on the windowsill with money-plants crawling out of their mouths. These were duly watered by the cook, another remnant of the female roommate, who came into the apartment with her own key every morning and evening. At eight thousand rupees a month she was only too happy to cook and clean for this undemanding bachelor who never made a fuss about the food, always paid on time, and only occasionally greeted her with the unexpected remains of a late-night party; an overflowing mug of cigarette butts here, empty beer bottles strewn over there or some forgotten damp panties stashed under a bed. The spare room had its uses. All in all, Rohan led, one might say, the sweet life.

Rohan stepped out of the shower to see two missed calls and a text from Sanjay on his phone. He unlocked it.

‘de whr u da?? brng sum blck labl frm tasmac ok bloddy half the town is in my home only’

Alright then.

White shirt, blue jeans, watch. Rohan dabbed a dot of styling cream on his palm and ran his fingers through his lightly damp, tousled hair. He took the new shoes out of the shoebox, put them on and admired the rich, brown leather in the mirror for a minute before leaving the bedroom. He could tell from the sound of the jingling bangles emanating from the kitchen that Rukamma has come in already and had already started on the dishes from last night. He stuck his head in.

‘Rukamma, no need to come tomorrow morning. Late night for me today. No breakfast.’

Rukamma gave him a toothy grin, her arms and bangles covered in soap-suds up to her elbow, working the insides of those glasses in smooth circular motions.

‘Ah seri pa, naan naaliki evening varain.’

All the while her strong, lean forearms scrub, scrub, scrub-a-dub-dub away at the wine glasses in firm, yet careful, circles. Rohan grabbed the house-keys from its carelessly flung position on the floor cushion and was out the door.

--

‘De fucker, how long to wait for you da?’, Arjun opened the front door to Sanjay’s overflowing one-storey home.

‘Friday night, man. Going to Tasmac is a royal pain.’

‘Yeah ok something. Sanjay’s whining like a bitch.’

Sanjay’s home was cosy. Not in the way that brokers meant when they tried to fob off disgustingly-small homes upon you. His home was actually comfortable, with simple wooden furniture and enough space to throw a party. It was bathed in warm tones, with lots of paintings and crooks in the wall that he filled with small wooden figurines and sculptures he brought back from his trips. At twenty-four, he was three years younger than Rohan, but with a stable day-job at his dad’s business, and a home of his own, he was set. They met at one of the plays that Sanjay was performing in and that Rohan has gone to cover as a theatre critic and freelance journalist.

Sanjay wasn’t kidding about half the town being in here either. There were at least forty people at his place, mulling around the dining table laden with drinks and ice or spilling out into the small backyard garden through the French windows in the dining room.

‘That bastard won’t come. He’s found some honey from the play and is hitting on her’, Arjun said as he extended a plastic cup filled with some dark bubbly liquid. Rohan took a swig. It was rum and coke. He spotted Sanjay on the couch listening intently to a short, buxom girl in a floral dress.

‘So where’s Deepak?’ Rohan asked, taking one of the ice-cubes from the drink into his mouth.

‘De waste fucker da. That chute takes two hours to get ready, like some bloody girl.’

Rohan smiled at this. Bitching about how late Deepak was to everything was one of Arjun’s pet peeves.

‘De machan, I went to his home ok, bastard has some apricot fucking scrub in his bathroom. Fucking apricot machan... bloody think of the devil.’

Deepak walked over looking as immaculately put-together as always. His hair was carefully fashioned into that just-out-of-bed look. He came over and thumped Arjun on the back.

‘What re, bitching about me as usual?’, he casually asked as he pulled a pack of Wills Classic out of his stone-washed jeans and tapped it on the end before offering Rohan one. Deepak had just turned thirty last week and one of his birthday resolutions was to drink, smoke and whore around as much as he could before taking off to London in a couple of months. Having spent the last six years in a demanding job climbing all the right ladders, he decided to take a break, and after getting accepted at a business school in London, swore promptly to ruin both liver and lung as he reined in his thirties. Despite his general lack of attention to his health, he was the fittest thirty-year-old Rohan had ever met, owing not in small part to his unfaltering dedication to hitting the gym every day. That’s where Deepak met Rohan and Arjun six years ago when he first moved to Chennai.

‘So what’s the story here?’, Deepak motioned to where the guests were drinking and laughing in the living area. One of Sanjay’s cast-mates had broken into a gangster-rap rendition of his monologue from that evening’s play.

‘Who cares da. Some fat fuck. Looks like Ms Big Jugs is more interested in his antics than Sanjay‘, Arjun nudged Rohan as he looked over in Sanjay’s direction. Sanjay was staring idly into the cup in his hand as he swished his drink around, his face turning a deep shade of red. The buxom floral-print girl was bright-eyed and captivated by the cast-mate’s impromptu performance.

Arjun sighed, ‘That guy will never learn da. He goes and is all sensitive and interested and shit with all these young dumb chicks and then gets all dejected when they blow him off after a drink or two. Fucker needs to close his wallet and put it back in his pocket and try being a little rough with them for a change. And stop whining so much about not having a girlfriend.’

‘He’s young da’, Rohan said, ‘give him time.’

‘I wasn’t talking about Sanjay’, Deepak said as he took a drag and let a flume of smoke out his nostrils. Rohan and Arjun followed his gaze to where it settled, on a young girl, probably no more than nineteen, twenty tops, in a short white dress and pretty, fragile features. She was gently swaying on her pastel kitten-heels, her fingers sloppily clutching the cup in her hands. Rohan had noticed her when he walked in, leaning against the wall with a drink in her hand and not really talking to anyone else at the party.

‘Cradle-robber’, Arjun grinned at Deepak.

The girl was unmistakably drunk. Her hair fell in soft curls that framed her pretty, pixie-like face. She had a small, button nose and bright, dark eyes that darted wildly around the room. Every now and then she would look abruptly around at the party, at the paintings, at the dining table, at the drunken dancing, but her eyes would finally circle back and rest upon the man seated on the couch.

Rohan had covered enough plays and knew enough of the theatre scene to know who he was. Nikhil was the thirty-nine year old director of Sanjay’s latest play. The man was recently married, and was here making an appearance with his wife. Their marriage created somewhat of a scandal when it happened a year ago, in part because she was so young, so beautiful, so talented, and in part because Nikhil was as notorious for his roving eye as he was for his directorial talents. Last Rohan had heard, there were some murmurings of Nikhil being at it again with the young girls in his troupe, and all was not well in his marriage. The wife, it seemed, was tired of having left behind family, friends and fame as an upcoming contemporary dancer, to move to Madras and get married to a middle-aged man with a mid-life crisis. Nikhil sat by his wife’s side, looping an arm casually around her stiff stomach, laughing ever so slightly overloud at his friend’s antics. But Rohan was aware that Nikhil knew – and his wife knew – that the girl in white held her tormented gaze for only one person there that night.

‘She’s gonna drop it!’Arjun hissed as the girl’s grip finally loosened and sent the cup of whatever the hell drink it was splashing on to the tiled-floor. A few people around her looked up and past her, their eyes impatiently searching for the responsible sober friend she surely must have come with. Nikhil and his wife firmly looked straight on, her tight mouth tensing only the slightest bit, her waist growing infinitesimally stiffer under her husband’s cupped palm. The girl in the white dress looked around dazed and wobbled unsteadily on her heels, her face ready to break into a million fragments.

Rohan finished the last of his drink in a quick gulp, ‘I’ll drop her home da. Anyway I wanted to get that piece written tonight. Better get back.’

‘Useless. Ok fine. Don’t forget tomorrow’s the big after-party. Final show or some shit it seems. Anyway. Lots of booze.’ Arjun said, as he and Deepak walked over to where Sanjay was seated on the sofa, his shoulders slumped forward as he absentmindedly took sips from an empty plastic cup.

--

One... two... three... and she rode out valiantly, upon horse with sword unsheathed, her long golden tresses trailing behind her, from under her helmet, like a flag on fire on the battlefield.... six... seven... eight... she was fading into the dream and smoke and invading daylight, taking with her the slain heros and warriors to Valhalla... ten.

Rohan’s hand reached out and pressed the off button on his alarm. Daylight flooded into his small orange bedroom. He’d been up all night finishing off a piece about some women’s event or the other that he had the misfortune to cover last week. He glanced at his clock. 5pm. Good. That gave him some time before the show tonight, and he had all of Sunday to work on the play review anyway. He swung his legs to the side of the bed and got up and walked into the living room.

There was a plate overturned on another and set beside a porcelain cup with scrap of paper balanced over it like a lid. Rohan removed the top plate and found a slice of toast and some eggs, now cold. The porcelain cup held tea, although it appeared to have such a thick skin on it to be virtually undrinkable. It was probably sitting there since morning. Rohan smiled thinking of last night.

He had driven Parvati, for that was the name of the weepy-faced girl at the party, back to his home after many unsuccessful attempts at getting her to tell him where she lived. As far as he could tell, she came to the party alone, by auto no less, all the way out to Sanjay’s home in that godforsaken corner of Chennai. Between sobs, and soggy tissues and sips of hot coffee that Rohan made for her, she protested that no she was not drunk thankyouverymuch just a little under the weather and why shouldn’t she be since that no good two timing bastard who texted and called her incessantly day and night for the last three months claiming that she was the only woman who could make him feel alive again this gorgeous beautiful woman whom he pulled into this private intimate universe he created for just the two of them – here she blew her nose quite loudly into a crumpled wad of tissue – appeared to be nothing more than a liar and a cheat and a no good slut and why cant men be sluts youtellme this useless waste of a man mayhismotherswomb implode after carrying such disease into this world SO anyway shes not drunk and thats that and she will jolly well go home when shes good and ready and can she have more coffee please.

Between the tears and the warbling and the drunken tangential meanderings of her lovestruck and sleep-addled mind, Rohan found her absolutely, tragically, hilariously beautiful. At any rate he would never have made a move on a drunk girl although she clawed at him, weeping into his white shirt at first, then kissing the tanned exposed flesh where it peaked from beneath the shirt, then lifting her head with such melancholic charm and staring into his eyes that Rohan had to muster every ounce of his strength to not cradle her beautiful, tear-soaked face in his palms as he put his mouth upon her lips, on that wet quivering lower lip that he would have loved to suck, bite, comfort and caress with his exploring tongue.

At any rate, after her tearful story, her energy spent, she sobbed and snivelled into Rohan’s white shirt – now duly crumpled – and finally drifted to sleep, still muttering under her breath maythatcur burn in hell and his penis erupt in pus filled boils that two bit no talent man slut.

He put her in the other room, and placed an empty dustbin beside her just in case. After a long, cold shower, he had sat down to write about the botoxed ladies of Harrington road and their unremarkable shenanigans, and sent the piece to his editor in the wee hours of the breaking dawn. Exhausted, he had fallen asleep in the morning, and no doubt Parvati let herself out whenever she woke up without waking him. No note, no sign of her ever having been there – except for the breakfast she made before leaving, and the washed coffee cups from last night overturned and drying on the kitchen sill.

His phone’s loud ring brought him back into the present.

‘Fucker, where the fuck are you, bloody behenchod I’ve been trying you... Get here get here now’, Arjun was shrieking into the phone, his voice progressively climbing the higher registers of his voice box that Rohan was surprised to discover.

‘Hey chill, what happened?’

‘De machan, my mother came home da, she’s in the fucking living room with some useless fucking dogface she wants me to marry and this chick is in my room.’

‘I thought you said your folks were out of town’

‘De mother... BASTARD, I THOUGHT SO TOO! But they’re here no to ruin my life?? Get your ass here man, I cant hold her off for long.’

Rohan went into the bathroom to splash his face with cold water and throw on a fresh shirt. His house keys were in their usual place.

--

‘Then what happened?’

‘Then what da. Bloody I fucking shat my load. She wasn’t supposed to be home, and of all things, she decides to sit down on the bloody sofa then only and show me some dogface retard with crores sitting pretty in her daddy’s bank account’

Arjun was furiously puffing away at his cigarette, standing outside the small wooden roadside shack opposite the auditorium where the play was supposed to begin in half an hour. Sanjay was intently hanging on to his every word, evidently all vestiges of last night’s rejections purged from his mind. Rohan and Deepak were sitting perched on the low stone wall that ran alongside the road, gently blowing on their small, steaming glasses of tea.

The events of the last hour were this. Rohan drove over to Arjun’s home and rang the doorbell whereby he was promptly seized by Aunty and his opinion of her future potential daughter-in-law fervently sought. The girl that Arjun kept referring to as dogface, did not in fact resemble a canine in any way whatsoever according to Rohan, except for her rather unfortunate protruding front teeth that poked out from beneath her fuzzy lip and made her appear like she was snarling. At any rate, perhaps Rohan might be able to offer a better opinion once his parched throat was quenched and incidentally, would Aunty like some help in the kitchen, he always loved her Madras filter coffee, and my how he used to find some excuse or the other to go to Arjun’s place after school back when they were kids just to get a plate of her home-made murukkus and a small tumbler of coffee. And thus, a crisis was diverted, the hidden lover smuggled out of the home, a piping hot plate of murukkus and Madras filter coffee thrust into Rohan’s hands, and a very nervous chain-smoking Arjun bundled into the front seat of Rohan’s car and brought to the play venue where Deepak promptly laughed in his face for a full seven minutes upon hearing the whole story.

‘Ok, but who was she da’, Sanjay asked between sips of the tea he’d ordered for himself despite his director’s admonition that milk ruined the voice.

‘Some rich ugly beast, man.’

‘No da, the other one. Your girl.’

‘Oh that’, Arjun suddenly suffered from an unrelenting itch on his neck, as he scratched and averted his eyes and mumbled under his breath, ‘some lady I met.’

‘Oh give us a name Arjun’, Deepak called out from the wall, grinning at Arjun’s obvious discomfort.

‘Some chick I met recently man.’

‘Yeah, but it’s not the first time you’ve been in this situation before... your mom would throw a fit, but finally she’ll pipe down only. Why are you so cautious da? Some big-shot ah?’ Sanjay had finally caught on.

‘I bet Rohan caught a good look at her, what with his one eye in the kitchen and the one firmly on the front door. What eh Rohan? Who’s this mystery babe whose got Mr A’s knickers in a twist’, Deepak winked at Rohan as he fished out a Wills from his pocket and offered Rohan one.

‘Machan... free’ Arjun saw that Deepak was having too much fun to let this go, ‘Ok fine, but you shut your face about this. It’s Shoba Narasimhan’, he said, dropping his voice to barely above a whisper on the last two words.

The three of them let out a low whistle. Rohan suspected it might have been someone famous, maybe a rich socialite, or one of those newface-fairskinned actresses clambering to get into big budget Tamil flicks. But Aunty’s kitty party former-friend and current-sworn-enemy? Arjun was swimming in shark-infested waters.

‘Miss tight ass, tight face? How does she even move man, she’s got so much botox on her face’, Deepak said.

‘Botox that her husband paid for’, Sanjay interjected, ‘De why are you fucking around with that guy’s wife da! He’ll run you over with his BMW 7 series if he finds out.’

‘De why are you such a loser da! Shut the fuck up and lower your voice, useless bastard!’Arjun yelled back.

‘I heard she got a boob job man, is it true?’Deepak asked.

Arjun threw his half-smoked cigarette on the ground, stamped it out with great vengeance and started walking back to the auditorium in a huff.

Deepak started chuckling, ‘Guys, show’s gonna start in a few minutes anyway. Let’s go.’

--

Rohan was smoking a cigarette on the corridor outside the auditorium entrance. It had been fifteen minutes into the play and the lead actor was such an uncontrolled windbag that Rohan had to get out of there. As a critic, he was obligated to sit through the entire farcical proceedings, but as a normal, decent, sensitive human being he had to get the fuck out of there.

Deepak, on the other hand, had far too much sense to let a minor thing like a shitty play ruin a perfectly good evening of theatre, and he managed of course in his distinctly characteristic way of dealing with things by laughing loudly through the tragedy at the most inappropriate moments. The thing about Deepak’s laughs was that they were big, whooping, belly-laughs that went crashing through the auditorium, bouncing off the walls, breaking off into smaller fissures, and creating ripples of tiny laughs in pockets across the audience. Soon the entire audience was in splits as the baffled protagonist stumbled about on stage lamenting even louder the general despair and misery of his poverty-stricken situation, only to be greeted with a fresh wave of irrepressible audience laughter.

Outside, out of the corner of his eye, Rohan spied that he was not alone. A striking woman, an actress in the play no doubt judging from her dress and painted face, was out on the lonely corridor smoking in silence. He hadn’t seen her yet. Perhaps her part had not yet come.

‘So tell me’, she broke the silence, ‘Is Chennai usually this merry?’

‘No not usually’, Rohan replied, ‘but the heat does strange things to people.’

At this she smiled. ‘I’m sure it does’, she said and flicked the dying embers of her cigarette stubs into the abyss of night. ‘That’s a good line. I think I’ll work that in.’ she spoke half to herself as she disappeared in the darkness of the corridor, near the stage entrance.

Rohan lingered for a second longer in the corridor. He brought to mind again the imprint of her features against the full-mooned sky. Sharp, smooth-skinned and beautiful – even despite the war paint of stage make-up. She was by no means young. But God, what a voice.

‘Let’s make this city forget its heat for one night, hmm?’ the voice rang out from the darkness startling him, ‘You will see me from the audience’.

It was really not much of a request. Rohan extinguished his cigarette and pushed open the audience doors.

--

Her name was Lopa.

She was surrounded by people at the after-party at Sanjay’s home. This time Sanjay was playing the dutiful host, ensuring that cups were full, and alcohol ran a-plenty. The lead actor, after being equal parts insulted and flabbergasted by the Chennai audience’s reaction, declared them all a bunch of villagers unworthy of good theatre and remained in a dark and simmering mood when they last spoke to him after the show. Buxom floral-print girl, who it appeared had cast off her floral prints in favour of a tight white top with a plunging neckline, sat mournfully on the corner of the couch getting slowly drunk and hoping that last night’s entertainer will make another appearance tonight and perhaps maybe he might even take her home to show her that music collection of his she so wanted to see last night.

Rohan, stood on the fringes of the raucous crowd, for a change not flanked by either Arjun or Deepak, who both incidentally bumped into a friend of a friend of a friend who had all grown up and fleshed out and was new in the city with her friend and what do a couple of girls on a Saturday night do around here for fun anyway? So they left.

It appeared that Lopa was an actress of some repute back in Mumbai where she was from. Stage, not film, she told all the little moths than had gathered around her old-school silver screen siren flame, laughing as she tilted her head back ever so slightly, just enough to flash a dazzling set of perfectly set, perfectly white teeth. Rohan’s first impressions of her were right. She was stunning, with sharp beautiful features set upon smooth skin. She was older than him but not by much. In fact, he’d be surprised if she was a day over thirty-five. And she could command an audience and she knew it. There, smack in the centre of Sanjay’s house ultimateafterparty version two, she had the crowd eating out of her hands as she made her inconsequential small talk, taking offbeat pauses to suck on her cigarette while her listeners held their breath till she spoke again in that soothing voice like a balm over wounds.

When Rohan had entered the auditorium after their chat in the corridor, the audience was absolutely unruly. There were hoots and cheers and catcalls. Handkerchiefs flung into the air, tickets thrown up and fluttering down like so much confetti, even cell phones ringing in some sort of mad impromptu audience orchestra.

And then Lopa appeared.

She took one slow step and then another. At first the audience didn’t know what to make of it, hooting and cheering wildly. But she stood her ground, and she faced them all with the steely silent glare that you remember from your school days as you trembled under the anticipated rage of a headmistress disobeyed.

It would have been five minutes at least. Five whole minutes. Absolute silence. Not a line was spoken, not a movement made on stage on in the audience. Nothing but Lopa on stage staring down the audience under the bright spotlight focused on her deathly still, maniacal eyes.

And then she began her lines.

Needless to say, the play received a roaring ovation at the end, and Lopa stood outside her stage door smiling and waving, and smiling and waving, and signing autographs like an old-fashioned movie star. In all his experience, and perhaps in Chennai’s recent memory, such an experience was unprecedented. Rohan didn’t know what to make of it. But he will make something of it, that he was sure of, when pen would touch paper the next morning. But tonight, there was nothing on his mind but Lopa.

What a glorious name. Lopa.

From across the sea of bobbing heads, she caught his eye and smiled in a tired, endearing sort of way. Smiling, and clasping hands, and crinkling her eyes, she thanked warmly everyone for their dear, dear comments and made her way across the room in a fluid, meandering way like warm yolk running down a porcelain plate.

‘Well then’, she said when she was standing next to him, ‘looks like the evening wasn’t a total washout.’

‘Looks like it wasn’t’, Rohan said and smiled at her. Up this close and under the harsh yellow lights of Sanjay’s home, he could see the faint stirrings of crow’s feet from the sides of her eyes. Irrationally, he wanted to punch out the lights with his bare fists and kiss her roughly in the darkness.

‘This is a really nice place’, she ventured by way of small talk.

‘Yes, it’s Sanjay’s’, Rohan pointed him out to her amidst the bobbing black heads, ‘he’s not really a party-freak, don’t let that T-shirt fool you. But that needn’t mean this can’t be the most happening after-party party place in town.’

‘Mm-hmm’, she nodded in quiet understanding. ‘Does this have a terrace?’ she asked him abruptly.

‘Why...why yes’, Rohan floundered, ‘we’re actually standing on the stairs that lead up to it. It’s a one-storey house you know.’

Lopa stood on the step next to Rohan, tilting her head to one side, her cold glass held up to her face, allowing the cool drops of water on the outside of her glass trickle down her cheeks, as she drooped her eyelids. As if the lights were beginning to sting her eyes.

‘Come on then’, Rohan grabbed her hand and walked into the cool, night air.

--

‘So it was the night of a party at her agent’s house’, she said as she leaned against the terrace wall, ‘and the public was so upset that Elizabeth Taylor had taken up with her best friend Debbie Reynold’s husband so soon after her own husband Mike Todd’s death. And she was drinking champagne from a sparkling crystal glass. And she beckoned Shirley McLaine over to where she was seated, at the little table between the piano and the outside candles.’

Lopa took a drag of her cigarette, as she let Rohan form the scene in my mind.

‘She began to quietly talk about her love for Mike and why Eddie meant so much to her because of his deep friendship with Mike. Her eyes welled up with violet tears as she held her sparkling crystal glass close to her face. When the tears were about to fall, she subtly moved her champagne glass just under her eyes.’

Another drag. Another unbearably long silence following the lingering remains of her dulcet-toned voice as it hovered frozen over the deep purple night.

‘And then she says, Shirley McLaine in her book that is, that she would never forget it. Her tears splashed like diamonds into the champagne as she talked about missing Mike so much. She said she’d never seen anything more beautiful or moving, and the entire party seemed to pause in wonder for a moment.’

‘So’, she started again and let the half-formed word linger orphaned in the air, ‘so I say, there is truth; the unmistakable, stark, truth. And then there is beauty. And what is theatre, and what is performance, if it isn’t applying beauty to truth, to enhance it, to enhance life, to embrace this augmented reality.’

Rohan’s mind was reeling. He was listening of course – how could he not, how could he lose even a single precious word – and yet there was something here between their two bodies, something real and growing and tangible that seemed far much bigger than this conversation about Elizabeth Taylor and Shirley McLaine and Mike who and Richard what.

‘So sometimes that’s what I think I am’, she continued, ‘a sort of ‘truth-enhancer’. And when you live life that way,’ she paused again here and turned slowly to face Rohan. How could she be so cruel, so unbearably oblivious, to this tension in the night-air between them.

‘When you live life that way,’ she continued, as she turned back to the night, greeting him once more with the sharp features of her face in profile, ’it becomes such an integral part of you, that you forget where life begins and performance ends.’

Lopa fell into silence. Rohan was only aware of the rustling breeze as it entangled the tiny fly-away wisps of her hair. He wanted so badly to reach out and touch that inaccessible skin.

‘Do you want to kiss me?’ she asked him abruptly.

‘Yes.’ The answer rang clear and cool into the night without hesitation.

‘Then we mustn’t deny this moment’, she leaned back against the terrace wall, and tilted her head toward him, her eyes half closed, her mouth... Oh her mouth.

--

Arjun and Deepak were back. The stragglers were beginning to leave the party. Sanjay appeared to be quite comfortable sleeping in the corner of his living room, hugging a potted plant. Someone had made a shrine of beer bottles beside him. Rohan had been up on the terrace for almost an hour he realised.

Perhaps, he thought to himself, he really should consider it? Rohan’s life in Chennai was beginning to take on a sort of sameness as the days morphed into each other, and deadlines came and went, and events and social gatherings unfolded around the city, and Rukumma appeared every day, always smiling, always on time, with the reliability of the sun. Perhaps this would be the grand adventure that Rohan hadn’t known he was missing in his life. A new job, a new house, a new start in Mumbai.

As for Lopa... he wasn’t sure, but he expected she would figure somehow in his plans. At twenty-seven, he was already jaded, and she, with her maturity and grace and intoxicating beauty would be like a cool drink of water on a hot Madras day.

Rohan’s thoughts were interrupted by the booming voice of Ankur Walia, son of the Mumbai-based producer, the one with all the hits. He was blanking on the name, but he knew which one. Lopa glided across the room and into his arms, snaking one long limb around his waist and planting a small, platonic peck on his lips. How had he not noticed the ring before?

Of course she was married, Rohan thought and almost laughed aloud, like a mad drunk in an empty home. The kiss, the smoke, the talk.... it was all part of her larger-than-life persona. Part of her theatre, and her performance, and her augmented reality. And out there on the empty corridor, outside the auditorium, in the darkness – no wait, in the almost darkness, for there was a full-moon present – it was just enough light he realized for him to catch her perfect features in profile, and for her to catch his ‘Press’ tag as it hung innocently from his neck.

---

Rohan got in the car and locked the door. Beside him in a crumpled mass was Arjun, lightly snoring. Behind him was Deepak, who told him before passing out that those girls turned out to be a couple of nineteen-year old nitwits who got in their car, went home with them, got drunk on four beers and then started crying about needing to be home before curfew and oh god what will their moms say and who will let them in and it’s already almost two am and she doesn’t has the house key and... and.. and...

Rohan was drunk, but he’d been more drunk on other occasions and still gotten behind the wheel to drive people home. Besides, Chennai was lovely at night. He thought about the review for tomorrow and what he would write. Well, she certainly was one piece of work he’ll give her that. But in the end, Rohan thought as he drove down empty roads of tree-lined streets, Lopa never promised him anything; that was all his own fantasy. She gave him a beautiful moment, and she gave the audience the performance of a lifetime, and that was worth a few positive words at least.

Rohan stopped at a red light, more out of absentmindedness than any reverence for traffic laws. His phone blinked. Text message from Parvati. Parvati? Who? Ah that girl from the house party on Friday. He had almost forgotten her name. He unlocked it and read the message.

‘heyyyy!! listen m sooooo mbarassed abt that nite!!! plz lemme mke it up 2 u :))) thr’s a house party @ my place tomm nite. wanna cum? brng ur frendz. xoxo’

He looks at his friend sleeping next to him, his face etched in the borrowed red glow of the traffic light. Arjun was sound asleep, still snoring lighting, no idea of how his life with change forever with his impending marriage. Dogface or not, Rohan thought to himself, Arjun would soon get tired of being a toyboy and then it's one bachelor down. And Deepak? Rohan glances at his sleeping figure in the rear-mirror and wonders if he knows what his thirties have in store for him, liver-and-lung-ruination pledge be damned. The light turns green and taints his knuckles as Rohan rests his hands lightly on the wheel.

‘ya sure’ He types on the phone and presses send.

Yeah, he thinks to himself, why not. Perhaps some change in life is a good thing. Rohan smiles as he steps on the gas and drives through the green light. There would be some chicken curry in the fridge from Rukamma’s evening visit. God bless her.

This is the sweet life, he hums to himself as he drives through Chennai’s empty night roads, the sound of Arjun’s soft snoring filling the car with its steady rhythm.


1 comment:

Kaushik said...

If you're planning on submitting this anywhere, it might be a better idea not to post it to your blog. Many magazines and journals (especially the paying ones) don't accept material that's already been published online, even if it's self-published.

Not that you shouldn't spread the love by just putting it up for everyone. I do that quite often on my blog too. Plus it's cruel irony that the pieces I decide aren't worth saving for submission are in retrospect the better ones.